Todays Headlines

Fleeing Suspect Picks The Wrong Place To Hide
AP PHOENIX -A suspect who ran away from a traffic stop on Wednesday chose the wrong place to hide when he slipped under a parked moving truck — and then was run over when the driver pulled away.

Forget about the suspect, I didn't get past the parked moving truck. (Sometimes I enjoy the language so much.)


Former French President hospitalized after Mauling By His Clinically Depressed Poodle

Former French president Jacques Chirac was rushed to hospital after being mauled by his own 'clinically depressed' pet dog. The 76-year-old statesman was savaged by his white Maltese dog - which suffers from frenzied fits and is being treated with anti-depressants.

Pit Poodles and Maultese. You just aren't safe anymore.


Naked Burglar Gets Stuck In Chimney

Fox News - Firefighters discovered Daniel Davies, 20, after a delivery driver heard him yelling “help me” from the chimney stack of a convenience store near Manchester in October. Davies told police that he climbed onto the roof while trying to escape drug dealers he owed money. Prosecutors said Davies said his clothes fell off as he tried to escape the chimney.

The headline should have said, Drug user hides his crack.


Cajun squirrel among crisp flavours tested by Walkers

Crisps that taste of chili and chocolate, onion bhaji and even Cajun squirrel will be unleashed on the public as part of a Walkers competition to find a new flavour. Walkers launched its Do Us A Flavour campaign last July, challenging members of the public to think up a unique flavour of crisp.

Nothing new here. I read about Buffalo chips in the Little House on the Prairie books.


Did you know a Solar Flare Can can make your toilet stop working?

That's the surprising conclusion of a NASA-funded study by the National Academy of Sciences entitled Severe Space Weather Events—Understanding Societal and Economic Impacts. In the 132-page report, experts detailed what might happen to our modern, high-tech society in the event of a "super solar flare" followed by an extreme geomagnetic storm. They found that almost nothing is immune from space weather—not even the water in your bathroom.

Note to self. Keep a shovel handy.



Comments

Dear pamela. I think the frankness of the first headline is funny. "The wrong place to hide". You don't say!
Anonymous said…
ese are a hoot!!! I like your note to self!!
Anonymous said…
ps..it's actually 5:45 am! and Iam on my way to bed!!
DesLily said…
makes you wonder doesn't it? lol.. incredible these can be true LOL
Jenni said…
Caleb thought he would play hide and seek under his grandpa's pickup truck once when he was about 10. He didn't take into account that the truck had just been parked and the tailpipe was hot. It was summertime and he burned his bare back. He got quite the lecture while he was being doctored about how underneath cars is not a good place to hide. The guy in this story probably needs more than a lecture for poor choice of hiding spots though.

My favorite is "Drug user hides his crack." LOL!
Anonymous said…
maultese! Ha!
So happy to see "Today's Headlines." You made my day.
Anonymous said…
Drug user hides his crack ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Anonymous said…
Oops - that was me.
Jan said…
Thanks for the levity on this dreary day.
Desert Songbird said…
I have to wonder, how does someone go about diagnosing a dog with clinical depression?
Senator said…
Hi, I love you're blog! I just wanted to know if it was alright to add you to my blogroll on my blog? Thanks!
Robin said…
Truth is often stranger than fiction, isn't it... If you like these you must be a fellow This is True reader :).
sallywrites said…
Now that would not be nice to not have a working toilet. Better keep out of the way of those super solar flares!
Mojo said…
Oh my my my ... thanks. I needed a good laugh today!
Betty said…
The one about the man being mauled by his pet poodle intrigued me. I can't imagine a poodle attaching anyone, especially the owner.

Have a good weekend, Pamela
Jeanette said…
Gday Pamela, fancy hiding under a truck he got his just deserts as it moved off...hahahaha hiding crack....
have a good weekend..
Peter said…
Love 'em all Pamela, there's nothing better than a hearty laugh to brighten up our day.
Biker Betty said…
Pamela, you are one gifted blogger! I couldn't get past the cajun squirrel, yuk! I love squirrel, but only to watch them on my deck, lol.
Anonymous said…
Sometimes you have to wonder about the news that passes as news these days. Pretty funny "news" stories though!!
Gattina said…
Chirac attacked by his poodle ? Hahaha, I haven't heard about that !
Amanda said…
I saw the one about the dog attack. My first thought was: THE DAY I HAVE TO PUT MY ANIMAL ON ANTIDEPRESSANTS is the day they go to animal heaven. That's so silly!!!
carmilevy said…
These are so delightful, Pamela! I needed a smile today, and got many of them by visiting you!

I hope you'll pop by my blog sometime soon: you may be very pleasantly surprised by what you see!
Susie said…
I've really missed your great posts during my blogging break. I especially like your "notes to self"
How in the world do you find these news stories??
xo
Anonymous said…
My mom has a Maltese and I can't imagine being attacked by him let alone not being able to defend myself. Strange . . .

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