Todays Headlines

Tooth Embedded In Rugby Player's Head

Brisbane, Australia - Ruby player Ben Czislowski kept competing for more than three months despite the headaches that started after a clash with an opponent. Last week, his doctor found a tooth embedded in Czislowski's head

***I suppose finding any teeth left in a rugby players head would be a surprise.

Worms Fall From The Sky In Jennings

Jennings Police Department employee, Eleanor Beal was just crossing the street to go to work when something dropped from the sky. "When I saw that they were crawling, I said, 'It's worms! Get out of the way!'"

***There you have it. Global Worming.

Outhouses Yields Mysterious Artifacts

VENTURA, Calif. A spot where a pair of outhouses stood 130 years ago is proving to be a treasure trove for archaeologists who braved the lingering smell in the dirt to uncover some 19th century artifacts - and a mystery.

****Pull up your stool and join the pa-a-a-a-a-awty.

Manmade hunk of Metal Crashes through roof in New Jersey

BAYONNE, N.J. (AP) A man was watching television Tuesday when he heard a crash and saw a cloud of dust. In the next room, he found a hunk of grey metal measuring about nine centimetres by 12 centimetres, with two hexagonal holes.

Federal Aviation Administration spokesman Jim Peters said Wednesday that a colleague had solved the mystery: The chunk was part of a commercial wood chipper. How it got on a New Jersey roof was anyone's guess.

***Everyone is stumped.

Salad Prompts 1-hour Lock Down on Pittsburgh Government Office.

PITTSBURGH - It took a bomb-sniffing dog to figure out that a brown paper bag left in the bathroom of a government office building was just lunch.

The bag was found in a women's bathroom on a shelf under a sink. A sheriff's deputy arrived with a bomb-sniffing dog and quickly discovered there was nothing explosive about the salad.

***BLEW cheese. She should have asked for Roquefort.


Irene said…
Global Worming - pure genius! Haha! ;p
Susie said…
Great headlines! When I read the one about the outhouses, I was surprised they said there was still an odor after all these years..
min said…
That's amazing! Paris Hilton wasn't mentioned in any of those stories!
swamp witch said…
Aw, Little Miss Moi beat me to the punch with the bot fly article.

Where's Rosie O'Donnel in your list?
Walker said…
Sky worms are a sign of the apocalypse.
Tiggerlane said…
Your comments are absolutely PRICELESS. "Global worming" was my fav.

BTW, since you posted your colonoscopy on the web, I showed my husband...who got hysterical with laughter. Hope you don't mind, but I printed your post and a large version of the photo for him to take to work today. He works in the OR - and couldn't resist. No HIPA violation, since you freely put it out there, he assures me!

I'll give you the feedback - it's sure to be GREAT!
Debs said…
Love your headlines. I did see the rugby player with the tooth in his head on the news. The rest I missed. Thanks for keeping me updated. :)
Pamela said…
Miss Moi:
I considered the maggot head article. I read it yesterday and started getting creepy crawly feelings in my head- so I decided to go on.

Swampy: RR*sie is the queen of Publicity stunts.

I think there was something "smelly" about the article. I know a fellow who "diggs" and he says there is nothing to indicate it was ever a potty. No smell, etc.

Tiggerlane: be my guest.
Do tell them I have nice smile, tho. Thanks.

Irene: I've read of fish or frogs also falling from the sky. They are all smart. Indeed (:

Min: There's a Hilton in most big cities, and I've never stayed in one---Much less been to Paris.

Debs: there were so many weird headlines yesterday. A spray to squirt up your nose to cure shyness. Oh and Firemen training their fire fighting skills on the WRONG house.

Walker: At least for the worms! Don't expect they bounced well.
Tammy said…
Hysterical!!!! Thanks for the morning laugh with my coffee, Pamela!
her indoors said…
:-) magical thank you
wolfbaby said…
it always cracks me up when you do this LOL
BarnGoddess said…
omg, a salad caused a bomb scare....
PEA said…
Omigosh, I almost spit out my coffee while reading your headlines!! LOL You should put a warning label on your post about being sure not to be drinking while reading! hehe Tooo funny!!! xox
Bibi said…
Too funny ... very witty Pamela!
kailani said…
That worm one kind of creeped my out. Where in the world did it come from? I hope nothing falls on my head tomorrow. I'll run screaming!
Susie Q said…
Global Worming!!! You are hysterical! I am sitting here laughing and one of the cats is looking at me like I have completely lost my mind. The other cat just yawned and says she has seen me without a mind plenty of times.

These were wonderful!! Thank you Pam!

Global worming is my fav, too!! You are so clever!!
ChrisB said…
These are great -I did read about 'tooth' - the LMM link had me squirming- horrible!
Shelby said…
love the global worming one!!!!!!!!!!

very cute post :)
my4kids said…
"Global Worming".....hehe....
I don't think I've heard of any of these where do you find them?
kate said…
lol... you were in a witty mood today!

Can you even imagine finding a tooth in your head??? Umm and doncha think the guy who lost it would have said something?

Global worming... lol
Heather said…
I know I've told you this before, but seriously, this is your true calling. The global worming, oh my, pam.
Beccy said…
Global worming...pull up a stool...I don't know which one I like more!
PAT said…
I laughed outloud!! I am putting you in my favorites! What a boost you've given me, today!

Kila said…
Truth is stranger than fiction.
Gattina said…
Oh I missed this news ! They are great !!
Betty Jo said…
What an incredible blog you have! I've so enjoyed my visit. I found you through Susie Qs blog. Now I'm off to read more. I love your writing. xoxo
Carolyn said…
Just heard about your blog, and so glad I came by! First, I love everything in your header. LOL, and your "spin" on the headlines is hilarious. You have a great blog, and I for one, am so glad that you have chosen writing,(and living!), over cleaning! Will sure be back. Have a great day. :-)
Matt said…
Huh. What's the opposite of a wisdom tooth?
Regarding that last one... it really depends on the dressing.

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