Rear-Ended.

Sometimes I go to pick up the office mail in the middle of the afternoon. Usually our manager makes the trip. When I offer to go it is when I want to get outside and clear my head. I don't want to take the company car. I just want to put on my walking shoes and walk through the downtown. My route takes me past the coffee shops, the wine tasters, and all the banks.

On a warm sunny afternoon on a summer day I did just that.

As I approached the side street entrance to the government building I was shocked to see a young woman wearing a skimpy white shirt and white Capri's walk directly into the path of a car preparing to park. There was an older man driving. (Old is relative I guess - but he was at the least 20 years my senior.)

He wasn't parallel parking in the usual sense because there were two parking spaces open. He was driving straight in. Her appearance forced him to slam on his brakes.

The young woman, who should have used the crosswalk, jumped forward into the center of the street. She turned and started yelling profanities in a very loud voice that had others on the sidewalk stopping to stare. Oh, Me, too.

Then, she did the deed.

She turned away from him, dropped her pants, and bent over and mooned him with her bare behind. In the middle of the street. With cars stopped in both directions.

The old mans car must have been a stick shift, because it jerked forward abruptly, as if he had popped the clutch.

C-R-A-S-H! He totally smashed into the back end of the car in the forward parking slot.

I should have approached him to check for a heart attack or stroke. But, he looked so humiliated and horrified that I hurried on, climbed the stairs, and disappeared into the Post Office.

I was so disgusted,...............because I didn't have my camera.