The Grasshopper, Take Two

I share glass partitions and the late afternoon sun with coworkers. They are good people.

Dan (featured here and here) was at his desk as 5 o’clock pm approached on Wednesday.

Doreen stopped to discuss some paperwork and he picked up his refillable water bottle. She had his undivided attention while he took a healthy swig.

Immediately his eyes grew wide in horror, his cheeks inflated, and his body jerked right then left.

Doreen let out a muffled cry of alarm, dropped her books and bag on his desk, and moved towards him in confusion.

(Freeze Action) Two weeks ago I photographed a grasshopper on the glass pane at work and later posted it for Wordless Wednesday. Dan, in particular, was amused by my fascination with the little three-legged creature. Several days after the bug posing session, he humorously called my attention to “your little 3-legged friend” that was now camping by the printer we share. I decided to capture it and throw it out the door, but it hopped away behind a credenza when I approached. I was too busy to chase after it and the little insect was soon out of my mind. (Back to the Story)

Doreen began to fear the worst.

“For the life of me,” she said later, “I was so confused. My mind started racing through the possibilities. Heart attack? Seizure? Choking?”

Fortunately Dan quickly regained mental control. Still making gurgling sounds, he jerked the garbage receptacle from beneath his desk and dispatched the contents of his mouth in revulsion.

“Uh! A grasshopper!” cried Doreen, her eyes bugged in astonishment as it emerged from Dan’s spittle before it even reached its destination.

When the drama ended, I laughed so hard I was afraid I might damage my post surgery sinuses.

Dan made some cryptic remark towards me again about “your little friend,”

“My friend?” I retorted, “You’ve had a much more intimate relationship with that bug than me!”

He snorted.

Then, as a sort of afterthought he replied, “If that’s its modus operandi, I’m surprised it’s not missing more legs.”

That kept me giggling out the door and most of the way home.

Today he admitted that once I departed the premises he made sure that it would never happen again.

Poor Grasshopper.

(I’ve noticed that Dan now secures the cap on his water bottle after each use.)

**He called it 3 legged because it was missing one leg. In actuality, it was 5-legged, as it was missing one of it's 6 legs.