Fun Monday - The Worst Opening Sentence
The sun poked through the slatted window like the tines of a fork, because a spoon is too rounded, skewing her eyeballs, her head a wedge of muenster squeezed between two saltines, which have more crumbs than club crackers, that were continually scratching her throat, and the bottom of a canary cage taste in her mouth, not assuming otherwise about parakeets, with the resulting feathers pressuring her to sneeze and all the symptoms twisting her like a Rubik’s cube, rather than Twister that requires other players, throughout the night making her feel as though she’d been hit by a truck; a thought confirmed when she looked up to see Ken Worth standing in the hallway.
If you appreciated (or didn't) the one I wrote then you'll want to enjoy more of the same. This Monday, March 5, check out Min's list over at Mama Drama to see who is participating in this Fun Monday.
PS. I hope "her" is feeling better soon.
Comments
Ian
You did a marvelous job, like the kind of job a blog reader does when she winces in pain the fourth time she pours over the excruciating paragraph-sentence Bloglines thrust upon her in the guise of her innocent pal at the Dust Will Wait; grabbing the closest weapon to her computer, she crashes her Stanley stapler into the monitor, and cries out as the shards of monitor glass litter her keyboard.
I hate it when that happens.
Have a great week!
PS. I love the colour co-ordination.
"saltines, which have more crumbs than club crackers,"
Perfectly awful! I love it!
Melissa, I prefer club crackers just for that reason. Hey I tried them with marmite
Karmyn; with red, yellow and blue squares
purpleworms; it does make your tongue squirm yes?
Min: ya kinda have to read and re-read. The whole time saying whaaa?
East: sorry you had to read it
Robin: Thank you, I feel like Poe (never more, never more)
WT: You set the bar
PTT: Looks like you should have entered a sentence
Jen: It's sort of like a Limbo in words
Ian: I have 1/2 box of kleenix left, God Bless you.
Loved the canary cage reference but not the image it brings to my mind!
definitely one of the best, err, worst, out there.
(and love the green glob pic!)
Well done, my friend. Well done!!!
Bethany: thank you, just thank you.
LM Moi: I'm sick.
James: I'm honored to have overwhelmed You!
Heather: with club crackers
Nikki: that was the best compliment so far!
Enid: yea.
Sabrina: bottoms of bird cages have always intrigued me
Beccy: Check out the next bird cage you see and remember me
Kailani: I sent you a personal translation
(and, for shame to think otherwise about the parakeets!) :P